Cooking School Journal: Amber Calls

I was still on a high from the market tour. But, I think everyone around me, including the kids and Joe were beginning to get annoyed and concerned. Or maybe they were just thinking, “could you just shut up with the ¬†cantaloupe thing?”.

I guess I don’t blame them. There’s little worse than someone rambling on excitedly about things that are not so exciting. I couldn’t argue. But, I still talked about it mercilessly to anyone who would listen.

“Would you like paper or plastic?”

“Well, paper… but did you know a tamarind or tamarindo, as it is known in Latin America, has a surprisingly pleasant sweet and sour taste when bitten into?

The tamarind is native to tropical Africa and grows wild throughout the Sudan. It was introduced into India so long ago, it has often been reported to be indigenous there. It is extensively cultivated in tropical areas of the world. But, sometime during the sixteenth century, it was introduced into America and today is widely grown in Mexico. But, boy is it tasty! ”

“Uh- huh. Do you need help out Mrs. W?”

“Oh no thank you. I can manage.”

No one was spared.

But anyway…

After running four thousand errands the following day with a screaming toddler, I came home to a blinking answering machine.

You have one new message.

You have one new message.

I remember (slightly) the days before I was married. The blinking light on the answering machine was like cocaine. You dreamed about it all day. If it was not blinking you were completely devastated. If it shined its glorious light when you returned from a very long day, ¬†you enjoyed the most euphoric high as your index finger even approached the play button… It could be him!

But, luckily, ten years have gone by, and as I have grown spiritually and learned to enjoy the most that life has to offer.

The blinking message machine now just means one thing…

“Oh crap. Who do I have to call back now?”

I pressed the button.

“Hi Jules. This is Amber from cooking school. I think we should talk. Please call me back as soon as possible. Okay. Thanks.”

I played it four times.

I carefully examined each word and intonation until I came to the solid conclusion that she absolutely hates me and I was in big trouble.